Tuesday I was feeling extremely overwhelmed. (*Note* that I am a Parks and Recreation major...I can't even imagine how my engineering friends feel at this time). If I looked at my planner, I couldn't find a day with free time. Every time I opened my inbox, there were new emails of people asking for commitments or reminding me of group projects and papers. Even good things that I enjoy began to seem like a task or duty. To make it worse, I felt a deep sadness and fear for what was happening in Boston. In short: I was anxious, stressed, and fearful.
Can anyone relate...?
I came to my room and just sat on the floor. I didn't want to call my mom, I didn't want to talk to my roommates, and even though I knew I needed to, I didn't want to talk to the Lord.
But, as always, I began to feel the Lord speaking to me. Gently, lovingly, patiently. We are called to more than anxiety and fear! There is a being that upholds the universe, and He knows the numbers of hairs on my head (Luke 12:7, Matthew 10:30). I felt the Lord showing me that even if the whole world says that it is normal to be anxious, scared, and overwhelmed...it is NOT. There is a place of peace with Him. The church is called to be a place of light in the darkness. As students around me are constantly complaining about exams, or as Americans are scared to run races now because of potential bombings, we are called to have faith in the Lord.
Do I sound insensitive to the events that have occurred? That isn't what I'm saying at all. The events are tragic. Innocent lives were taken and changed forever. I find the people responsible cowardly, and I find my first reaction to be fear and confusion. BUT, I am saying that the Lord is bigger. I was listening to my pastor, Rick Joyner, from my home church, in Charlotte give his response to the Boston Marathon bombing. He discussed that he is actually amazed that things like this don't happen more often. He talked about his thankfulness for our FBI, troops, and police force that are constantly working to prevent these things. The events that have occurred are wrong, and they are scary. But our response shouldn't be fear. We have a faith and a hope in One that is greater than the evil in the world.
And what about this One. What about God. Where was He when the innocent three died in Boston? ...He was watching, mourning, and disgusted by the evil. Much more than any person was. I love the empathy our nation has for those in Boston. It brings joy to my heart to see so many mourning the losses of those at Sandy Hook elementary, or those in the marathon. However, I do not want to forget that we are able to feel empathy because the Lord himself is empathetic. All good things come from Him. There is evil in the world; if you and I hate it, how much more does the Lord who created the world hate it? Life is not always fair, but God is. Life is not always good, but God is. Justice will be served for everything that has happened, but who am I to bring justice? One moment I'm laughing at my sister, and the next I want to ring her neck because she wore my jeans. Point being: I am in no condition to judge the world. But there is one worthy. There is one consistent. There is one faithful, righteous, and just. He is loving, He is perfect, and HE alone will bring justice and comfort to the hurting. The very one that upholds the universe has seen the tragedies. He also sees my stresses with school and internships, and He cares.
Since Tuesday, I have had an overwhelming feeling...of peace. As I have focused my gaze upon the Lord and all He is doing, I do not worry about anything. I hope that you're encouraged today to look to the Lord! It can be the hardest thing to do, I know. I understand. When you're sitting in your room and have 1,000 commitments, it's undoubtedly difficult to put those things on hold and try to spend time with the Lord. We want something tangible and immediate. But I promise that sitting in His presence, you will be fulfilled! Best of luck with exams and Happy Friday:)
"But those who wait on the Lord will renew their strength..." -Isaiah 40:31
"Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the
world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid." -John 14:27
"May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him,
so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit." -Romans 15:13
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