Compassion and control are not the same. Many times, as I am trying to help someone and becoming overwhelmed by doing so, I think that I am having compassion. Most of the time (not always) I am really just trying to control their life. That sounds a little strong...but it is true.1 Corinthians 13 is well versed by most Americans... "Love is patient, kind..." etc, etc. However, sometimes when I try to love people, I just become frustrated. But, why? Because we can't fix others. The burden of others lives and salvation is not on us. We are not God.
You might think, "Well, Duh" to the statement above, but do you really live like you know that? We are not God. We are to, of course, be obedient and faithful to Jesus. Serving others, sharing His love. But serving someone isn't controlling their life and their decisions. It is no doubt hard to watch someone you love go down a path of destruction. You should talk to them, be honest, and love them. You should even be burdened by their choices. However, you shouldn't be burdened to the point of anxiety and frustration. If you find yourself taking on too much stress for another, stop and evaluate- we are NEVER to feel anxious. We are to balance love, serving others, and sharing the gospel, but we aren't to feel like we controlled/have control over someone's decisions.
Yet, at the same time our words have the power (because of the Lord) to change and affect eternities...
This balance of all of these ideas can feel overwhelming. How do you love but not control? But don't be overwhelmed. Our first commandment is to love the Lord with ALL (Matthew 22:36-40). When you love Jesus with all of you, you find fulfillment and peace, and the Holy Spirit guides you to naturally balance these things.
Jesus! Do you know Him? Over this New Years, I had the opportunity to go to the "OneThing" christian conference in Kansas City, Mo. If there is one thing (ha!) that I took away from the conference, it is that Jesus is worthy. He isn't just a name, or a character in history, or a being we can't talk to. He is alive! He desires relationship with us. Yes, I have grown up in a Christian home. But for so much of my little twenty years, I didn't get it. I spent all of high school and much of college trying to fill my life with friendships, volleyball, school, and boys. None of these things are inherently bad in themselves, but they are empty when they are a substitute for Jesus rather than a supplement. I'll spend my life getting to know Him more. I've been best friends with my sister since I was born, yet I am always learning more about her and growing closer to her- relationships take time, patience, and love to cultivate. We are always changing...physically, mentally, emotionally. Jesus is never changing.
Do you know Him? I pray you do. He is more than a "passport stamp to Heaven" (as Mike Bickle says). So many are taught this. Believe in Him, try to live a decent life, and go to heaven. No! It's a relationship. Full of love. Everything you're looking for rests in Him- I don't care what this world, your boyfriend, or your boss tell you. So many talk about "heaven" as this paradise and don't even mention God. "Heaven" isn't enough in itself- I want Jesus! (As the deer pants for water, so my soul pants for you Oh God. Psalm 42:1) I want heaven because God the Father, Spirit, and Son are there! Jesus is my soul's desire. And He is returning to the world to claim those who know Him and to bring justice to the world.
I know this seems confusing, maybe even foreign to some of you. But relationships take time to develop. Don't be intimidated. Don't believe the lie that "it's too late for me to understand all this." It is never too late! Blessed be the name of the Lord- He alone is Holy and Worthy! :)
"Who is a GOD like you, who pardons sin and forgives [our] transgressions...?"
-Micah 7:18
-Micah 7:18
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